Only one for me ....

I lived all this days with my lips sealed

and carrying my unshed tears

But in my heart ..the flames of love

has always been burning for you

Simply for you

But how cruel this world for me ..

It was ordered that I have to live without you ..

They said that you are unknown to me

This world tries to prove that you are not for me

may be that is the reality or may be that is the truth

which I dont want to admit

But still ...I dont know a way to forget this love

dont know a way to remove this love

I just desired you every moment in my life

Even upon death this love will never fade from my heart

those words u said , those actions u had ..

all that comes as a memory to me which covered from tears

My dearest darling

give your sorrows to me ...and let me carry all that for you

I only need to see your happiness

no matter what goes around me

all I need is the smile for you

and happiness should be eternal in your life

Coz you are in my prayers

and each prayer says your name

and only thing it ask from God

is the comfort for you

and to keep you covered

with the tenderness of love ....

I know separation will be unbearable for me

I just dont want even to think of it ..

I know its the only thing which will remain with me

but still I dont mind

from far away on earth

still I will remain keeping you inside my heart

thinking that you are in joy..

Love you my little princess

Miss you sooooo much

Missing you soooooooooooooo much

Darling I dont know why ...

But I miss you sooooooooooooo much today

Dont even feel like going to sleep

just awaiting with a hope of a message from you

But I wonder whether you are feeling the same

I just just cant take it anymore darling

You ...my little princess

I cant resist my heart which is crying for you

it just doesnt let me do anything than waiting

waiting for a call from you

can you hear me...

can you read this silence

it simply wants to say how much I love you

and this very moment I miss you sooooooooooo much !!!

My eyes are paining of looking at skype

still its ready to wait few more hours

staring and wait for a call from you

I just just cant wait anymore

Simply simply miss you my sweet little princess

I cant understand this world

and what it has given me

It finally gave me a person to love

to love with all my heart

coz you were the exact one

that this heart looked for all this time

a heart that can feel for love

but too unfortunate to see that

I cant express  my love the way I want

I know then it will sure be a burden to you

Coz if I start revealing my self

then there wont be any time for you to do anything

than being with me

as I cant live even a second without you

a minute without thinking of you

will sure be a time that I dont breath

coz you have taken my breath away

heart is paining now darling

its really hurting

and I cant do anything than just looking at your photos

listening to your recordings

But still I need to hear from you live

right now ..in this very moment

coz I am missing the best part of me

and I  miss you soooooooo much my love

I am missing you so badly this time..

Call me soooooooooooooooooooon!!!

I need you by my side ...Atleast make sleep comes closer to me

So that I can live with you in my dreams ....

Till the Sun Grows Cold....

All this time I loved you ..loved you...loved you..

and at last I realized that you never wanted it to be so

All this year I kept you so secure inside my heart

and just covered you with the tenderness of love

Inside my heart I made you the queen ..

I made you the part which is not replaceable..

But still you never knew it ..never valued it..

All this time you rejected it 

rejected it as a piece of dust which passed by your foot

But darling still you never noticed how this heart can take it

You never knew that the cut will be so deep 

if you leave is so

its just bleeding where no one can stop till the death

So I understand that no one can stop this 

never ever can be replaced either 

the love for you is so precious and unique that

only you can have it 

and it will remain as it is thou how much you reject it..

You really replaced many people in my heart

But none could replace the place which you were in

that is the reality my dearest love....

You know what ...I never knew a word called jealousy

But seems you are trying to teach me what it is

Coz when my love made me filled my heart with you 

and tears comes in when I see that you are gone

and even more tears comes out 

when I see that you are in some ones heart

But still I bear it 

you know why ??

Coz I dont want you to suffer being with me

if you never wanted me

I can be happy if you are happy with the people 

you are staying with ..

But just remember 

that any time any day 

this little heart will remain the same 

thou you have been left alone with nothing

I will be there no matter where in the world I will be

thou you have grown old and ugly

still you will be the prettiest my eyes wanted to see

Thou you become deaf and dumbs

still I will be there to read your silence 

as that is the best tune which my ears wanted to hear

You are my beloved lover..

yes you are 

no matter how much far away you stay 

you still live inside me

and no matter what silence go through us

This love will never die

no matter how much I try 

to turn the burning fire inside me 

into a cold and calm place

still I couldnt even take a single flame out 

as your smile which has stuck inside me

has made me live thousand more years

having this love for you 

I miss you so much and 

wanna hug you and simply say 

I LOVE YOU 

Love from distance....

This is a big silence..
But do you know darling what this means
What this silence really means ...
It really makes me love you more and more
It makes me feel for you more and more
But my darling
how sad to see that I cant express my self
at all in front of you

Truly with all my heart I still love 

I just cant believe how u stole my heart like this

without having a need of having me even for a second 

for your life

I dont know what miracle you did 

to make me love you this much 

I know you worth giving my love

also I know its no use as you never wanted it

But tell me one little tip to make my heart

forget u darling

I just cant live even  a second without having you in my mind

I try not to contact you 

I try not to talk to you 

I try not to keep you inside my heart

But all this time after all that effort 

I realized that by doing all that 

I make my heart love you more

I make my self miss you more

I wonder ..still wonder 

how you occupied me this much

without letting any other come in 

You not only occupied my mind

but also occupied my dreams

Every second i live 

I live with you ...

You are far away 

and may be even far away from your mind

But for me ..you are just inside my heart

Always..every second...

I cant take this silence darling

but still I know I cant express my self to you 

If I am to be..

All this time I just wanted to say 

just wished to murmur to your ears 

I LOVE YOU !!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SUucYNWmiOI&feature=fvsr

Weren't you a mum to me...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gj1HcughPSg&feature=related 

You lighted my life just as the moon
Nourished my career and made my future
You let me have courage to go for
You made my life smelling like a flower

You made me think of you as my sister
May be as my own mother
May be as a beloved friend
Who was with me when in need
I know this is a bond came from
my birth to birth ..
I never had a replacement for you
Still couldn't find a replacement either
I just dont have words to say
how much you meant to my life

Whenever I see you my whole life shines
Whenever I talk to you all my pains leave me
Whenever I feel you I get the best
the best touch ever around me
Without you I have no life
I cant think of even a breath without you
You teached me the real mean of love
The real feeling of love
You made me feel it to the deepest

My dearest darling
I will be your shadow and will hold you
whenever you need a hand to lean on..
First thing in the morning
I worship you even before my God
Coz without you I am nowhere
I will make your dreams come true

I hope one day happiness will come
and kiss your feets
As your happiness is mine and your sorrow
In many more births to come
I want you right beside
As some one who will live with me
till my death ...

Before I sleep I say I love you
And in my dreams I hold you so tight
So that even if I die next day
I die with the love I have for you..
When ever you comes to my mind
I end up in tears
As that much I miss you
No matter what I do
I do it with you as you live in me...

Darling I love you   I love you
I love you   I love you
I love you   I love you
I love you   I love you
I love you   I love you

So please tell me and go
Why you didnt feel it same way
what was missing in my love
Coz I couldnt find any reason
to why you left me
Left me in this much pain
Did I do anything wrong
by loving you this much ??
Tell me my darling ...
Didnt you even feel an inch
of what I felt for you

May be I am not the prettiest
for some one to love me
May be I am not the sweetest
for some one to feel for me
May be I am not fair enough
for some one to attract for me
But atleast didnt you feel
the love I gave you
??
That is all what I want to know
Simply an answer for
why you never wanted my love .....

I LOVE YOU

Sun is falling down
And it wont shine again in my life
This is the end of summer
Which is not gonna come back ever
So as the mind think of it..
Just like a volcano burns
my heart starts to ache
It is so much unbearable to say
how much painful
to think of a life without you !!
Which I am doing right now

People say love is a nice feeling
Which I always agreed
but some said its a painful wound
Till today I never knew it
Now I know that its a wound
which can never be healed
to see the real skin..
Even after ages it might heal
but still the mark will never leave

I gave my whole heart
Gave every inch of it
Every blood cell wrote your name
Every nerve plugged into your thoughts
Now you are gone and my heart is clashed
Its in thousand and thousand pieces
Which I cant repair at all

What a love is this ...
I want to kill this love
and throw my heart away
But how can I take you so easy
coz you are bind to my life
And I should die if I am to live without you

At this very moment ..
I dont want to talk to anyone
I dont want to eat anything
I dont want to sleep at night
All I need is to cry
Cry cry cry cry and cry
Until I take off all my tears
from my broken heart

Gosh I still live in that beautiful past
where I waited for your calls
Waited to listen to your voice
and counted days to see you ...
You were all over me
I saw the Goddess of love within you
When ever you are with me
I lived as if I am in heavan

I felt every bit of you
Your smile , your touch, your voice
Every second I lived with all that
You wont get it my dearest darling
You really wont get it...
You were everything to me..
you were my life, my pride
I kept my needs away
to full fill yours
Hope one day you will see all this..
And understand that there was a person
who loved you more than anyone in the world

You were number one in my life
and  I never even had a number two
From one to ten if I counted
Still it was only you
But darling...you came to my life
just to teach me how to live alone
But you know what I learned ??
I learned to live and die with love !!!
I simply wanna die now ...
That is all I need my love

Loving you is just like having a beautiful wound...

Living without you is
just like the body living without the soul
I know that is the truth..
But still I need to face the reality
which says that you are no where
you are no where for me..

One week just passed..
with utter silence
which proved that you really can do so
I know you can
coz you never wanted me at all
but did you ever thought
how this heart is gonna take it??
how this heart can bear that pain
pain of missing you
I know you wont feel it
you will never feel it ..
But atleast if u can understand
that there is a heart which is crying for u

I passed this week same as you
but with one difference
I spent each second with you
keeping you in my mind
i want to kill my love inside
which was born for you
I want to do it
so I didnt try to contact you
coz I cant be a bother
to a person who dont need me

First ever in my life
I felt so deep in me
what real love is
I dont know why it went so deep
and I dont know how to explain
the feeling I felt which is so fresh
Very very new within me

I kept on going in this road
Kept on reaching high
knowing that you never wanted me
Knowing that you never loved me
But after one whole year
keeping only you in my heart
I only had tears
I couldnt even express my love
the way I wanted
Still I dont regret
coz I loved you
May be I still do so
But I need to give up this
I need to live my life
without you in my mind
coz its only me who feels all this
I know its such beautiful time
Which I could explain as a
beautiful wound I had
I never wanted to heal it so far
but now its time for me to
take actions to heal it
As I cant take this pain anymore

I love you..love you..love you..
Loved you to the fullest
Loved you to the deepest
From now on I would say
that I loved you ...
Coz I cant carry this anymore
I got see a end to this mirage
Which only I had in my dreams

I know you wont loose anything
Its only me who will loose everything
by letting you go
but I rather do it than keeping something
within me which is not mine at all

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ya7_3g7-chQ&feature=related

I want to spent my life time loving you !!!

I dont know how to say ..

I dont know how to show

I dont know how to express...

How much you mean to me

coz all this time

when ever I want to show you

how much you mean to me

you blocked me to the end

you stopped me saying what I felt

you stopped me saying I love you

You stopped me saying I miss you

it ended up me in tears

Ended in an aching heart

It was so unbearable to stay

right infront of you

keeping all my feelings

closed inside...

I know its not what you wanted from me

I know its not what you wanted me to say

you wanted me to work

Give the best to make your baby grow

But one thing you never realized

how hard it is to be with you

without letting me as me

I just feel that I am pretending

pretending as you are just a one

just a one who is as others

Which I hate

but cant help

coz that is what you need from me

to pretend that you are just

just a CEO to me

But inside my heart

you are everything

every inch of my skin is covered with your touch

every second I live my heart spell your name

Every minute I live I dream of you

I feel the warmth just as you are right beside...

Gosh but all that is stuck inside me

where I am just like a lifeless robot

who cannot express even a single thought

of what I feel inside..

All I know is every breath I take

I take with your name

So I cant take this pain anymore

of having being blocked

in all what I could say...

Love you raththaran !!!!

I am Blocked ...

Every day when I get up
I want to say good morning to you ..
Every minute when I think of you
I wanna text you to say hi
Each time I have my meals
I want to share it with you 

Every time I sleep 

I wanna gently kiss you and say good night

I wanna feed you a bite 

of every meal I have

I wanna sleep right next to you

feeling every breath you put out

Its not just that
I want to talk over and over
the same thing with you
and laugh as if no one around
I want to write poems
send songs and sayings
to say how much I love you
How much I miss you
when you are not around
I want to say all the sweet words...
Which just flows from my mind
I want to kiss you in the softest way
to make you feel that you are in heaven..

I wanna let u come so deep in me
I wanna let you feel the very end of me
I wanna let you see what my eyes say
I wanna stay right next to you every way

Still with all that I need more
More ways to say how much I love you
more ways to show how much I need you
more ways to make you feel how much I miss you
more ways to let you know that you are my life

But I am blocked
I cant do any of those
except for doing the job
Simply the work you need
I know that..
But I cant filter it
and give you only work
so I am so confused
I dont know how to hide my feelings
I dont know how to show
that you are nothing to me...
I feel so restless and feel so depressed
when I am lost in my feelings
Which is bottled up within me
I cant let it go ..
That is the eternal truth I see

So God please help me
help me to stop loving
loving you from
the very end of my heart !!!