I really felt ....
I always felt her presence near by my side, though I havent met her in real. Can you believe how can it happen ?? it was almost 4 months that we talked but havent met at all. After four months , gosh a day came that I got to know that she is coming to see me. Well isnt it a suprising news ? For me it was the most most most suprising news. and also the rhythem of my heart changed when ever I think of her arrival. At last she landed. So early on that day she came. But you know what..I couldnt go and meet her which hurt me to the very end but still I controled my self and instead of my presence I arranged a flower boquet in the air port to welcome her. And also I went and decorated her hotel room with lovly baloons and stuff which she liked. I wanted her to feel a difference and warmth of being here.
She called me as soon as she arrived. So from that time onwards I was expecting to see her at my place. Her very close friend whom she treats as her own sister took her to her place and first day she couldnt make it possible to come and meet me. My eyes were soo painful of waiting.and when I realized that she didnt come then it was more hurt. But I didnt show her anything. How can I really show all that coz i didnt know what she will think if I show my true self. She might wonder how can a person go so deep without even meeting in real. So I kept silent. Next day she came. She really came..Really visited me which I couldnt believe. She ate from my place. the day I saw her my heart was trembling and beating sooooooooo fast. I never knew that she can be this pretty.
I did all the best I could do during her stay though I didnt get a chance to go around with her which I really wished for. How ever her departure really made my eyes filled with tears. It took one whole day for me to realize that she is gone. I couldnt take it than crying for what I was missing. She left back to home and contacted me. Then only I was some what ok. But I realized that I have crossed the barries to move on with this so that is why I get hurt this much when she is not around by my side.
No one knew except me that I was totally engaged in thoughts of her. I didnt let anyone know either. Coz it may create an issue. I always cried when ever she was in danger. It mostly felt the day that she almost fainted in a hotel for a pain she had in her ear. That is the day even I realized what will happen to me if something happen to her. Coz without her I really couldnt find my self. Just as if I was a part of her I felt all her pain and her sorrow. I felt it just as if its mine.
I never told her. But I always wanted her presence in my life. I never said but I always wanted her to start my day and end my day. Do you think a love can go this deep from one end ?? Coz she actually didnt gave any sign from her end. But still I was so blind to love her. I dont know why but even when she scolded me, I liked it. I liked all the mistakes she had in her life and I liked the way she do all those mistakes. I liked every single thing she did all day and night. Its true that she didnt love me coz later I realized that she had some one to be in love with. Where I have no space in her life. So then and there I stopped expressing my feelings to her. I never send her messages, lovly messages which I was sending before. But what hurts the most was that doing all this didnt take my love away. It grew day by day. I was soooooo helpless to see that my heart was way out of control. Do you think I should be responsible for it?? I mean I only should be responsible ??
To be continued ....
I always felt her presence near by my side, though I havent met her in real. Can you believe how can it happen ?? it was almost 4 months that we talked but havent met at all. After four months , gosh a day came that I got to know that she is coming to see me. Well isnt it a suprising news ? For me it was the most most most suprising news. and also the rhythem of my heart changed when ever I think of her arrival. At last she landed. So early on that day she came. But you know what..I couldnt go and meet her which hurt me to the very end but still I controled my self and instead of my presence I arranged a flower boquet in the air port to welcome her. And also I went and decorated her hotel room with lovly baloons and stuff which she liked. I wanted her to feel a difference and warmth of being here.
She called me as soon as she arrived. So from that time onwards I was expecting to see her at my place. Her very close friend whom she treats as her own sister took her to her place and first day she couldnt make it possible to come and meet me. My eyes were soo painful of waiting.and when I realized that she didnt come then it was more hurt. But I didnt show her anything. How can I really show all that coz i didnt know what she will think if I show my true self. She might wonder how can a person go so deep without even meeting in real. So I kept silent. Next day she came. She really came..Really visited me which I couldnt believe. She ate from my place. the day I saw her my heart was trembling and beating sooooooooo fast. I never knew that she can be this pretty.
I did all the best I could do during her stay though I didnt get a chance to go around with her which I really wished for. How ever her departure really made my eyes filled with tears. It took one whole day for me to realize that she is gone. I couldnt take it than crying for what I was missing. She left back to home and contacted me. Then only I was some what ok. But I realized that I have crossed the barries to move on with this so that is why I get hurt this much when she is not around by my side.
No one knew except me that I was totally engaged in thoughts of her. I didnt let anyone know either. Coz it may create an issue. I always cried when ever she was in danger. It mostly felt the day that she almost fainted in a hotel for a pain she had in her ear. That is the day even I realized what will happen to me if something happen to her. Coz without her I really couldnt find my self. Just as if I was a part of her I felt all her pain and her sorrow. I felt it just as if its mine.
I never told her. But I always wanted her presence in my life. I never said but I always wanted her to start my day and end my day. Do you think a love can go this deep from one end ?? Coz she actually didnt gave any sign from her end. But still I was so blind to love her. I dont know why but even when she scolded me, I liked it. I liked all the mistakes she had in her life and I liked the way she do all those mistakes. I liked every single thing she did all day and night. Its true that she didnt love me coz later I realized that she had some one to be in love with. Where I have no space in her life. So then and there I stopped expressing my feelings to her. I never send her messages, lovly messages which I was sending before. But what hurts the most was that doing all this didnt take my love away. It grew day by day. I was soooooo helpless to see that my heart was way out of control. Do you think I should be responsible for it?? I mean I only should be responsible ??
To be continued ....
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